Challenges Can Help Us Grow
Boarding Prefect and Choral Co-captain, Bethany, believes we should treat difficulties as opportunities – the grit to form a pearl.
Each week, our student leaders share their insights with their peers in Assembly.
I’m going to start by asking you all a question. Raise your hand if you are an overthinker. Look around. Did you raise your hand? Well, if you did, I don’t think you are an overthinker at all. Why? Because while you were happy to jump in and take action, the overthinkers in the room were thinking, “Am I an overthinker? I think I might be … should I raise my hand? Which hand? Left or right? Just the hand? The whole arm?”
In fact, when I came up with this idea, I began to think too much about it – would people think I’m weird, maybe it’s a silly idea but it would really get my point across, what if I’m the only one who overthinks every small thing so maybe I shouldn’t do it.
If you haven’t realised by now, I am an overthinker. I might even go so far as to say, I am also a champion worrier. Give me an issue, any issue, and I can tell you all the ways it could go wrong.
It’s something I’ve struggled with my whole life.
When I was younger, if my mum was coming back late from work, I couldn’t go to sleep until I had set eyes on her because what if something happened? What if she somehow forgot how to drive and couldn’t get home? Whilst it took me a while to realise that it was going to be okay and she wouldn’t just randomly forget how to drive, I now overthink other things.
2026 – to you, it’s probably just another year, to me, it’s absolutely petrifying. Will I get into the degree I want? What if I hate that degree? Will I make friends at uni? Will I keep in touch with my School friends? What happens after uni? Will I get a job that I like? What if I can’t get a job?
I should be excited for the future. I’m convinced that everyone else is, while I am a nervous wreck. But I have started to realise I am trying to control the uncontrollable and think about all the worst-case scenarios to prepare myself for hardship when, in reality, that might be overlooking some of the fun along the way.
Thinking is an essential life skill, it helps us to learn, grow, and develop.
Overthinking is the opposite. Learning requires action and mistake-making, allowing us to grow as individuals, through the good and the bad. Overthinking and worrying paralyse us, rob us of confidence, and stop us from jumping in.
When we overthink, we often focus on discomfort like fear of failure, doubt or not being in control. But if we try to break down these over-thoughts into smaller, more manageable pieces, they become challenges that can help us grow. Overthinking traps us in fear but action and learning, even when uncomfortable, build resilience and help us turn struggles into strength.
Instead of seeing difficulties as something to dwell on and defeat us, we should treat them as opportunities to create something valuable, a pearl if you will. This way of thinking won’t change overnight, but instead of letting our worries hold us back, we should try to be present, trust ourselves, and take action.
American humourist, Mark Twain, sums it up nicely saying, “I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened.”
So, don’t worry about what you can’t control and move on from being afraid to make mistakes. Because do you know what’s cool? Having no doubt. Just like Jake Peralta from Brooklyn 99 always says, “Cool cool cool, no doubt, no doubt.”
This is an edited version of Bethany’s Assembly speech.